"Drunk Walk" and Other Weird Things I Tell Clients That Aren't "Say Cheese"

I don't know what genius came up with "say cheese!" to get people to smile for photos. Has it ever worked? "Cheese" is a great word if you want to capture a maniacal sneer, or a clenched jaw and bared teeth. You might as well tell your subjects to pretend to sneeze before you press the shutter.